Motherhood So White by Nefertiti Austin

Motherhood So White

In America, Mother = WhiteThat's what Nefertiti, a single African American woman, discovered when she decided she wanted to adopt a Black baby boy out of the foster care system. Eager to finally join the motherhood ranks, Nefertiti was shocked when people started asking her why she wanted to adopt a "crack baby" or said that she would never be able to raise a Black son on her own. She realized that American society saw motherhood through a white ...

Details Motherhood So White

TitleMotherhood So White
Release DateSep 20th, 2019
GenreNonfiction, Autobiography, Memoir, Race, Parenting, Feminism, Biography

Reviews Motherhood So White

  • Erin
    Giveaway win!I devoured this book like it was a bag of mini Reese's Cups. Nefertiti Austin took the age old advice that "If you can't find the book you want to read, write it yourself" Nefertiti Austin was a single Black woman who had just adopted a sweet little black boy. Despite searching high and low she couldn't find a book written for or about black motherhood. And as far as books about adoption, it seemed as though only white people did tha...
  • LaToya King
    I received a DIGITAL ADVANCE READER’S COPY of this book from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.I recently read a tweet that identified white privilege as everyone learning to empathize and cater to whiteness. Unfortunately, we live in a society that does just that; we teach people to empathize and cater to whiteness in fairytales (think Goldilocks), in religion (white Jesus), and even in parenting. As a mother of two, I have seen the l...
  • Andre
    A book that will be a useful resource for Black women considering adoption........ Wasn’t it Toni Morrison who said, “if you can’t find the book you want to read, it’s your responsibility to write it.” Well that is exactly what Nefertiti Austin has done. Wanting to be a mother, Nefertiti found scant resources and texts available centered around Black women adopting Black children. So this book details her journey to motherhood through a...
  • Jenny (Reading Envy)
    This memoir of adoption and motherhood by Neferiti Austin also provides a much needed voice of black women adopting black children. She covers the process, dealing with birth families, dealing with new forms of mansplaining, and funny moments like teaching her son to pee standing up.I think the idea that unifies her experience with other experiences I've heard from adoptive parents is the importance of the community that emerges, which isn't alwa...
  • Stacie C
    I remember what it was like being pregnant with my son, flipping through the pages of What To Expect When You’re Expecting and preparing my house for a newborn. I was overwhelmed and excited. Motherhood hadn’t been a dream of mine, but with my husband I wanted an addition to my family. I didn’t gravitate towards books about motherhood having helped raise my two nephews and being around younger children throughout my life. It’s now after b...
  • Victoria B.
    I am very conflicted about this book. On the one hand, I appreciate her attempt to bridge the gap on the lack of mom books for Black families, especially those going through adoption. I think many of her thoughts are spot on (especially how too many people assume that adoptable Black children are "crack babies."), and I saw many similarities between the author's experiences and that which my siblings who adopted experienced - the difficulties wit...
  • Mandi Grasmeyer
    Laughed, cried, and learned so much from this book. So very grateful people like Nefertiti choose to share their stories! See full review at:
  • Janet
    I received a DIGITAL Advance Reader Copy of this book from #NetGalley in exchange for an honest review. From the publisher, as I do not regurgitate the contents or story of books in reviews, I let them do it. When Nefertiti Austin, a single African-American woman, decided she wanted to adopt a black baby boy out of the foster care system, she was unprepared for the fact that there is no place for black women in the “mommy wars.” Austin set of...
  • Kristen
    I absolutely hated this book. The author has such a huge chip on her shoulder. Instead of focusing on the universal experience of motherhood and the adoption process, the entire book was a racist rant. No thanks.
  • willaful
    Although I was interested in the topic, I couldn't finish this book, because I was so disgusted by the author's smugness. Other women are just baby-making machines to her. She pats herself on the back numerous times for her "altruistic" adoption of a black child -- though she wasn't altruistic enough to accept a child with any kind of issues. The final straw for me was her decision to not let her son have any contact with his biological family, w...
  • Jade
    I read quite a few parenting books when I was pregnant with my first child back in 2013, but quickly found that most of them followed a strict pattern, centering the middle class white American woman. I ended up resorting to searching for more relatable (to me) motherhood blogs, and also writing my own stories, because I couldn’t see myself in a lot of the content I was reading, and/or it made me feel as if I were failing motherhood in some way...
  • Nancy
    Advanced Reading Copies of Motherhood So White by Nefertiti Austin were provided to my library book club by the Book Club Cookbook through their Galley Match. Along with receiving copies of the book for all our regular book club members we also had a Skype visit with the author!Austin's experience as a single black woman adopting an African American boy inspired her to write her memoir. She discovered a dearth of books that spoke to her personal ...
  • Crystal
    Fills in a glaring gap in motherhood lit. Most parenting books are focused on cishet white women, far less are focused on adoption, and almost none are focused on Black women adopting Black babies, especially if they're male. Austin navigates a world in which her family seem baffled by her choice to adopt, male coworkers mansplain masculinity to her and seem doubtful she can raise a son in a way they approve of, she has to deal with her son's bir...
  • Erica
    This book was recommended to me after I read All the Sweeter: Families Share Their Stories of Adopting from Foster Care by Jean Minton. Both books detail the experience of adopting through the U.S. Foster system, with a focus on California. However, Ms. Austin's book is a much more personal accounting of not only her journey into motherhood, but her own life story as a Black woman and the experiences that impacted her decision to adopt a Black bo...
  • Gail
    College history instructor Nefertiti Austin could not find a parenting book that spoke to her experience as the Black single mother of an adopted Black son. She writes, “[M]y quest for narratives about Black mothers would be like looking for a needle in a haystack, but the white woman’s story would be told over and over.” Her book is not, however, primarily a manifesto or academic take examining this form of white centrality, though it cert...
  • Susie Dumond
    When Nefertiti Austin set out to adopt, she searched for resources for single Black moms of adopted children. She wasn't surprised by the dearth of materials. But she was surprised when she couldn't even find race-neutral resources. Based on the total lack of narratives like hers, she sat down to write the memoir/resource the world was missing. Motherhood So White is such an important book, and it will be crucial to many mothers and children that...
  • Josh
    The description alone is rather racist (and also kinda sexist). Also couples have a better chance of adopting. And too many black women get an abortion (or 2).
  • Kayo
    So informative. Great information if your looking to foster or adopt . Loved the realness. Like to know an update on authors life now. Nice book. Thanks to author,publisher and Netgalley for the chance to read this book. While I got the book for free,it had no bearing on the rating I gave it.
  • Basma
    When I first saw the title I immediately requested an advanced copy because I realized out of all the books I read that deal with motherhood in any way; the experience of being a mother, of not being a mother, of choosing to be childfree, of choosing adoption..etc, non of the ones I read or the ones I am able to find and access as easily are written by Black or Brown women. I hope this books gets as hyped as the rest of the motherhood books becau...
  • Kate Caldwell
    I feel conflicted about this. It’s a memoir and her story to tell so her story isn’t wrong. And I completely understand how whitewashed motherhood can feel - especially things geared towards white stay at home moms who are in heterosexual financially stable marriages and live in the suburbs... and I do notice how whitewashed children’s books are as I seek to introduce my white kid to all different kinds of people. That said, it sometimes ca...
  • Lynn
    Very Nice Book About African American Women Adopting African KidsThis is a very nice book about an educated African American woman who in her late 30s decided to adopt an African American male baby. She discusses her decision and how it worked out. She eventually adopts a daughter who is related to her son. As a high school then college student, she decides to pursue writing eventually getting a Master's degree in English. Her experience in adopt...
  • Bruin Mccon
    Motherhood So White is a memoir written from the perspective of a single black woman who adopts children. While this might seem very specific, the information in the book is useful for all mothers. The author wrote the book because there were far too few books written for this audience.Honestly, motherhood is soooooooo white. Viewpoints on parenthood from a non-white perspective are in short supply and this book will convince you that’s a d@mn ...
  • Julia
    I really enjoyed this memoir on motherhood from a perspective so different than my own. One of my goals for this year was to try to read books from people whose life experiences and racial backgrounds were different than mine. This book was one of my favourites in that way. I felt like my eyes were opened to the way the experience of motherhood can be so different from women who are not part of the majority culture, and found some of my own biase...
  • Samantha Barnes
    First of all, this book was enjoyable to read, and I appreciated just learning about another woman’s experience with adoption. However, it also expanded my view of adoption outside of my white lens, and in general it helped me see the struggles that I won’t have to face simply based on the color of my skin - though it also gave me snippets of things I might have to answer as an adoptive mom, no matter my or my child’s ethnicity. My hope is ...
  • Katy
    Austin sprinkles her touching personal story with interesting and relevant information about race, culture and parenting in America.
  • Viral
    Thanks to Sourcebooks for the ARC at BEA 2019, and to Nefertiti Austin for signing my copy!I really really loved this book. It was a powerful memoir from Austin about her childhood and journey into becoming a single adoptive parent, and seeing the inherent sexism, racism, and classism within the adoption system and community. Austin discusses at length how we have been conditioned to view motherhood as a white concept, something that is the domai...
  • Lara Lillibridge
    "Motherhood is so white and in need of a revolution."This memoir is situated in history, examining the effects of racism in Black families as well as telling one woman's story of becoming an adoptive single mama. It's an intelligent book—Austin is a US History college professor, and her book is incredibly nuanced—her story spans through generations in order to help us understand where we are today. But it's also heart-warming and funny. Austi...
  • Joanne
    The chapter I've enjoyed most in this book is the one with the same title as the book, and I've copied her reading list from the back for later so I can follow up. It makes an important point about how motherhood is defined in the American experience (e.g., media, mommy blogs) by white mothers. It's very thoughtful when talking about the way the myth of the Black welfare mom was created, for example, or how singleness looks different for Black mo...
  • Biography & Memoir
    Author and activist Nefertiti Austin (ETERNITY, ABANDON) recounts her struggles in childhood and her victories as a determined black woman who chose to adopt two children, presenting revelations about the subtleties of institutional racism as it affects black mothers and their kids.Austin was raised for a time by her parents, both of whom battled with poverty and addiction. When those demons got the better of them, she and her brother were taken ...