The Power of a Positive No by William Ury

The Power of a Positive No

No is perhaps the most important and certainly the most powerful word in the language. Every day we find ourselves in situations where we need to say No–to people at work, at home, and in our communities–because No is the word we must use to protect ourselves and to stand up for everything and everyone that matters to us. But as we all know, the wrong No can also destroy what we most value by alienating and angering people. That’s why sayin...

Details The Power of a Positive No

TitleThe Power of a Positive No
Release DateFeb 27th, 2007
GenreBusiness, Nonfiction, Psychology, Self Help, Leadership, Language, Communication

Reviews The Power of a Positive No

  • Payam
    Yes, I know you are here to read a review.No. I won't write the review you want to read.Yes, I will still capture my thoughts on the book, but it will not be a review you want to read.Saying "No" can be nerve-racking. The disapproval and judgement we may receive in saying "No" can deter many people from properly expressing themselves. Why do we feel this? More importantly, is this a problem? It is a problem, in that by not saying "No", you do not...
  • Ahmed Wali
    كتاب رااائع .. ومتأسف أنني أخذت وقتا طويلا في قراءته فهو فعلا يستحق القراءة المتتابعةيفسر حقيقة رفض الإنسان لشيء ما، ويقترح الطرق المناسبة التي تجعل هذا الرفض مقبولاأعجبتني استشهاداته برفض غاندي للظلم وتفسيره له
  • Dr. Ruth Neustifter
    I read this book after exiting a difficult situation as best I could, yet feeling that I somehow didn't do it as well as I should have. Although I tend to shy away from both business books and self-help books, unless I know the author well, this one just called out to me from the shelf. Thank goodness I snapped it up. Basically, the book coaches the reader on socially advisable routes to keep yourself and your family well balanced. That's a huge ...
  • Kipi
    Can "no" actually mean "yes"? Yes, it can, according to William Ury in The Power of a Positive No: How to Say No and Still Get to Yes. I read his book Getting to Yes about a year ago and feel, as a mediator, this book is much more helpful and practical because it focuses on the importance of relationship over that of reaching a "deal." This paragraph in the final chapter sums up the author's message:The great problem today is that we have divorce...
  • Ann
    I really like William Ury as an author. He founded the Harvard Negotiation Project and writes good negotiation books. His first book Getting to Yes, is a good book on negotiation theory. His second Getting past no, talks about difficult negotiations. His third, the power of the positive no could really be the first in the series with self analysis of what you really want before you negotiate. I should have read this book years ago! I like his ide...
  • Sharon
    More than 20 years ago, I was introduced to William Ury's concepts of "Getting Past No" and "Getting to Yes" during conflict negotiation and mediation - and several of his key phrases have stuck with me ever since. I'd still like to re-read each of those books as well, but noticed my library had this on audio so I grabbed it. It's an excellent read, and I highly recommend it.
  • Holly
    Heaven knows I needed the information from this book, however, it could and should have been covered in 4-5 chapters instead of 12. The author's main contribution is helping the individual recognize and feel good about a proper no with his yes, no, yes formula. Yes to my underlying need/value, no to the current proposition, and Yest to opening further dialogue.
  • Eileen Sauer
    This is "must read" for everyone. More important than getting to yes, is being able to say no to all of the things that prevent you from accomplishing the things you say yes to. Doing this in a graceful way is even harder. Saying yes when you really mean no means being a pushover. Saying a blunt no can hurt feelings and close doors. So how do you do this in a graceful way? The key is by balancing what would appear to be contradictory characterist...
  • Vasyl Pasternak
    great book
  • Tami
    No. Such a simple word yet it's so hard to use. Most of us take on far too much because we are afraid to say no and for good reason. We've all had experiences were we did actually muster the courage to say no and felt extremely guilty afterwards. Moreover, the person who we said no to often gets mad at us and that simple word starts a huge drama. In the end, it would have been much easier just to shut our mouths. Evidentially, our problem wasn't ...
  • Mark Ruzomberka
    Yes. No. Yes. That pretty much sums up this book. My entire grad school negotiation course was based on Ury's first book "Getting to Yes", so, I figured I'd give this one a try too. I was extremely pleased with the book. I did not realize how many times in a day this would come in handy. It is nice to be able to confidently say no to people without having it be confrontational. Or, even worse caving in just to try and keep the other party happy. ...
  • Tom
    Ury, William (2007), The Power of a Positive No: How to Say No and Still Get to Yes, Bantam Books, New York, NY. This book is the piece de resistance for Willam Ury. It addresses a challenge that many leaders face in negotiation: How to firmly yet gracefully say “no” in any negotiation, yet still have the door open to future win/win collaboration. A must read for anyone who negotiates anything. That is, for everyone.
  • Ariah
    This was a great book, very practical and useful. I haven't read his more popular Getting to Yes book, but I think this was a better fit for the type of tools I was looking for. The approach, examples, and methodology where super solid, simple to understand and extremely practical. Honestly found myself using it in several instances already that hadn't been my original intention. Good stuff.
  • Chris Schutte
    A lot of helpful advice on saying "no", especially relevant for leaders.
  • Lloyd Dalton
    This was shorter, more direct, and more valuable than the earlier two books in the trilogy (Getting to Yes and Getting past No).
  • Thông Trần
    Bạn đã bao giờ thấy khó xử khi cả núi công việc chưa xong nhưng lại nhận được lời nhờ giúp đỡ từ những người 'không thể từ chối' ; đã bao giờ bạn không hài lòng về những quyết định, những ý kiến của người khác nhưng lại chưa dám lên tiếng vì sợ ảnh hưởng đến những mối quan hệ? Nếu câu trả lời là có, thì mình nghĩ các bạn nên đ...
  • Daniel
    This was one of hundreds of books recommended in Tim Ferriss' Tribe of Mentors, and it's totally worthwhile. One of the questions in the book is, "In the last five years, what have you become better at saying no to (distractions, invitations, etc.)? What new realizations and/or approaches helped? Any other tips?" and so many of the contributors admitted to sucking at saying no (and so do I). Here's Ury's formula, excerpted from Lifehacker: The st...
  • JP
    As Ury claims, this really is the complement to Getting to Yes. It's arguably more important because it focuses on something that most people find hard to do, and yet saying no is so critical to the success of any person or team. This book first explains how to think about the "no" situation and then how to go about it. It goes deeper than just laying out a bunch of tactics. At the core, you have to know what you're saying yes to that makes it ne...
  • Bửu Giao Huỳnh Nguyễn
    Sau khi đọc quyển sách này. Mình nhận thấy lời nói "Không" đôi khi cũng rất quan trọng. Vì trong cuộc sống không hẳn 100% điều gì đó sẽ được người khác đồng thuận, đôi lúc phải nói "Không". Nhưng từ "Không" thường mang tính chất tiêu cực, là một yếu tố làm rạn nứt các mối quan hệ, làm chuyển biến xấu hơn tình hình hiện tại. Tác giả William Ur...
  • Becky
    I have begun and discarded a number of books on saying no over the years, finding many of them to be full of irrelevant assumptions and pretty trite in their advice. This book finally provided the payoff. While occasionally slipping into jargon-y language, this book provides some profound advice in dealing with our relationships and the conflicts that inevitably arise. I especially loved the juxtaposition of family life examples with examples dra...
  • Andrew Vanderlinden
    The Power of a Positive No Saying no is not easy. If your like me, you are afraid you are going to hurt the relationship. If you find yourself overcommitted and unsure what to do about it, this book might be fore you. The structure of a positive no is a "Yes! No. Yes? statement." In the authors words: The first Yes! expresses your interest; the No asserts your power; and the second Yes? furthers your relationship.
  • Will Lindsey
    Bottom line, if you have ever struggled with taking on too much, establishing limits, and being consistent with telling someone No, this book is a fantastic read. It's also short enough to get the information out quickly while being thorough enough to explain logic with stories and examples.I will probably read this book many times in the years to come. Real life application towards real world situations.
  • Rich
    This book is full of what Ury calls uncommon sense; we're already aware of a lot of what he talks about, but rarely do we do what is best for us despite the knowledge we have. Full of practical advice and examples, I've already been able to use some of the tactics from this book and have learned that a positive no is the best way to say yes.
  • Anh Cao
    How to say no?- Pause a moment to calm yourself before saying "no"- Find a solid reason for you to say "no"- Prepare a new solution to make up for your "no"- Prepare a firm backup plan when your opponent reject your "no"- Think carefully again, does saying "no" really more beneficial for you or not....
  • Long Nguyễn
    It's the good book. It give me some ideals before prepare for meeting with my boss to discuss about my benefit in new year.I suggest everyone read it once time and if you have time maybe read again will give you clear all situations in your life and prepare saying "NO" on time
  • Alex
    Brilliantly simple and concise. Ury is a practitioner and the book is based on his knowledge and experience. The simplicity of the concept is what makes the framework easy to understand and thus even easier to keep in mind and apply in real life situations. A must read for everyone.
  • Christopher Vitali
    Essential readingHighly, highly recommend. This is vital reading for all, and will lie amongst the pantheon of life skills books that are missing in schools, universities and the office. Highly practical, digestible and thoroughly well written. Thank you Mr. Ury.
  • Ngan
    Yes - No - Yes How good a fomula...Love it just becauz it's necessarily right and helpful in kind of situations in order to maintain a harmonious relationship.Highly recommend for anyone wanting to be the the master of your emotion, literally, happy vs. angry"Go to the Balcony" :))
  • Scott Wozniak
    One of the best books on saying no I have ever read. And saying no is one of the most critical skills for health and success.I recommend this for everyone who has a relationship--yes, that's all of us.
  • Jumah Al-mazrooie
    I loved reading it and learned from it the positive no .